Schiedea globosa is a subdioecious subshrub that is weakly woody only at the base. The stems are often swollen at the nodes, terete (cylindrical), 4-angled, or ridged, measuring 0.5–3 (up to 10) dm long. The stems are usually thick and somewhat succulent, prostrate to ascending, forming clumps, with internodes 0.3–2 (up to 7) cm long. The one or two internodes below the inflorescence elongate to 7–10.5 cm long. The stems are yellowish green, glabrous proximally, and puberulent or glandular-puberulent on the distal stems and inflorescence. The leaves are simple and opposite, with linear or linear-elliptic to linear-subulate blades, occasionally elliptic-oblanceolate, falcate, measuring 3–14 (up to 16) cm long and 0.3–1.5 (up to 2.5) cm wide. The leaf apex is long-attenuate, and the base tapers and is connate at the node. The leaf surfaces are glabrous, recurved, succulent-coriaceous, and glossy. The margins are entire and inconspicuously revolute, with 1, 3, or 5 veins, the midrib being more prominent than the lateral veins when present. The leaves are petiolate and weakly to conspicuously connate around the stem. Stipules are absent. The flowers are in terminal, very congested, head-like inflorescences with 69–460 flowers, 1–4 cm long, sometimes extending to 15 cm with one or two pairs of additional lateral clusters at the next lower nodes. The staminate inflorescence is less congested and less-flowered than the pistillate inflorescence, and both are moderately puberulent or glandular-puberulent throughout. The bracts of the central axis are 2–10 (up to 30) mm long, and those of branches and flowers are 1–3 mm long. The flowers are subdioecious, with bisexual (perfect) flowers similar to staminate flowers except that the ovary and styles are functional. The calyx of staminate flowers have sepals that are 2.5–3.3 mm long, ovate, green or tinged purple toward the apex, opaque, reflexed, and convex at the base, producing a small transverse bulge, broadly navicular, oriented at a 100° to 120° angle to the pedicel, moderately puberulent or glandular-puberulent. The calyx of pistillate flowers have sepals that are 2.5–3 mm long, ovate, green or tinged purple toward the apex, opaque, reflexed, and convex at the base, producing a small transverse bulge, deeply navicular, oriented at a 100° to 130° angle to the pedicel, moderately puberulent or glandular-puberulent. The corolla (petals) is absent. The stamens in staminate flowers number 10 (occasionally 11), with subequal filaments 3.5–4.5 mm long and anthers 0.8–1.3 mm long, yellow. The pistillate flowers have 9–10 (occasionally 11) vestigial stamens, with unequal filaments, the alternate whorl always shorter than the antisepalous whorl, 0.6–1.5 mm long, and anthers 0.2–0.3 mm long, yellow, not producing pollen. The ovary is superior in pistillate flowers, 1-celled, with free-central ovule placentation, and 3–6 styles. The staminate flowers have 3–6 green, short, and non-functional styles, becoming shriveled. The fruit is a capsule 2–4.5 mm long and narrowly ovoid. The seeds are 0.7–1 mm long, relatively few, reniform, compressed, with transversely rugose faces and papillose margins. The perisperm is starchy and hard, with true endosperm absent. It is found on steep, north-facing rocky slopes or cliffs in coastal habitats between 0-460 meters.